When satan Attacks

29 01 2007

Originally posted in a previous blog on December 6, 2006.

Ephesians 6:11 – 12 Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

As we humans tend to do or believe everything to one extreme or another, I am going to divide us into 2 groups. 1 – Those who blame satan for everything bad in their lives. 2 – Those who pretend satan doesn’t exist. Which one are you? Hopefully, by the end of this, you may lean more toward the middle somewhere.

You cannot read the verses above without coming to an understanding that satan is indeed real and that we – as Christians – are at war with him and his hordes of demons. However, these verses do not remove the fact that we are pretty good at sinning on our own (ref. Romans 3:23) . Nor do they remove the fact that our God tests us and disciplines us in order to grow us into the Christians He wants us to be.

So … what does a satanic attack look like and how can we stand against them? I wish I had the one perfect answer for you, but I do not. However, what I can offer are my own personal struggles and how I deal with them.

There are many things that happen in my life that are bad that are simply results from the sins in my life that come from being a sinner … such as debt, weight gain, snapping at my kids, laughing at my wife when she runs into an exercise bike because she didn’t turn on the light – not that this ever happened … and I made sure she was ok first. I do not go around giving satan credit for these. I beat myself up about them. I ask God to change me and strengthen me to make be better. I discipline myself to overcome these.

So, from where do the satanic attacks come. For me, I find that satanic attacks are more frequently mental attacks. I say “for me” because “for Job” they were definitely physical attacks. But in my case, they are mental. Small things will happen around me (things that are everyday type things), and I will begin having thoughts that make the small situation into something it is not … and was never going to be. These thoughts could be classified as lustful, power-hungry, greedy, selfish, etc. I believe that these are real satanic attacks on me to get me to follow through with decisions that will be divisive or hurtful to those close to me. I cannot describe them much more than that. I finish by saying I have come to recognize them as attacks because try as I may … I am unable to simply dismiss them and start thinking of something new. The barrage continues.

There are only 2 things that I have found that help me during these times. Prayer and the Bible! I talk to God about what is happening. I voice my concerns. And I read His Word searching for answers to what I am dealing with.

I feel as if I have typed a bunch of rubbish above. I hope that is not the case. I hope that in these words, you have found some kind of truth or hope that can help you continue in your Christian walk.

Go with God,
Donald B



95 responses

28 03 2007


This may sound crazy to you… I have not always been a true christian, raised as catholic, not really going to church except Christmas and Easter (family).

I was a victim of crime, home invasion…man with knife in middle of the night, husband was able to retieve knife, with GODS HELP!

I seriously felt satan and GOD in my bedroom that night (5 years ago). Also felt good spirit of some sort, leave me a few days later.
God must of felt I could take care of the rest on my own, even though I did not think so. I did.

Following day, my husband gave me the bible, while we were staying at a hotel, due to I was not going back to the evil presence in our home. I read it from begining to end. Then read student bible to comprehend better, from begiining to end.

Big picture of Jesus on my livingroom wall, gives me comfort in this world.

Told you this will sound crazy to you…He messes with my thoughts, hates it when I read the bible, and everytime I do, something happens, confusing my mind, messing with my godly thoughts, hates it when I recite “The Lords Prayer”, which I do to protect myself from him. My life was never messy like it is now, prior to being a Christain and loving God and Jesus as I do.

Any suggestions?

I know he is a very intelligent being, and know when I am being attacked, and know he is watching for my reaction.

Help if you can,


29 03 2007
Donald B

Patty …

I don’t think you are crazy, and I would never minimalize any one’s experience. Satan is real and his demons are real. Spiritual attacks are real. It’s a known fact that Satan and his horde are out to get us.

Ephesians 6:10 – 18
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

I have a couple of things I would like to point out to you though.

Satan may be intelligent, but he is not omnipresence. That means he can’t be every where at the same time … like God. He’s not God!

So, be careful when you say Satan is attacking you. He can only go after one person at a time since he’s not omnipresence. And for me … I would feel like I was elevating myself if I said Satan were attacking me.

Now his demons … that’s another story. I firmly believe that play havoc in our lives on a daily basis to break our focus from what is important … SERVING JESUS CHRIST!!!

For instance … today I was having a great time studying Ephesians 1 in my car before work. All of a sudden, a car alarm in a car just in front of me starts going off. I do get distracted for about 15 seconds and then, it hits me. This is a distraction to take me out of the Word. So, I give it to God and do my best to ignore the alarm.

Final point I have for you. Spiritual battles are real! Spiritual forces are real! But we have God on our side! He will fight our battles. We can rest secure in knowing that there is nothing those demons can do that can break my relationship with Christ.

Check out this quote …
“Charles Spurgeon, the great 19th century preacher in England, once told the story that one night as he was sleeping, his bed began to shake. He thought it was a thunderstorm, but he said, “When I woke up and looked, there was Satan standing at the foot of my bed. Satan himself was shaking my bed. I looked at him and said, ‘Oh, it’s only you,’ and I rolled over and went back to sleep.”

Final suggestion … read Romans 8 and meditate on that for a while!

Go with God,
Donald B

13 07 2011
Bob the Chef

I’m not sure I buy the argument from omnipresence. Satan exists in eternity, which means constraints on time and space do not apply to him. And the argument from “elevating myself” is a bit shaky. Who are we to know who he chooses to attack? And I think it’s a jump to conclude that our friend here has in mind an elevated sense of importance. I think she just means evil of some sort, with it’s origin in Satan, was perhaps attacking her.

Now, when our friend says Satan is attacking her, for all intents and purposes, she could be saying the demons in his service are doing it. Just as we say Hitler attacked Leningrad, even though he didn’t personally attack Leningrad, we can say Satan, that is demons in his employ who carry out his will, is attacking you. Personally, I would go with “the forces of evil” but we must be careful not to take pride in nitpicking, especially presumptuous nitpicking, when there is no need. We must communicate concern to our friend and ask for clarification, and if the medium restricts a step by step approach, to indicate that we are only anticipating possibilities and not running with a presumption because we like the sound of our own voices.

12 07 2007
Laila Hamideh

I feel like there are demons attacking me. This sounds like I probably have a mental ilness but I really believe in heaven, God, Jesus, Satan, demons, and hell. I believe that demons bother because they see I am getting closer to the Lord and His spirit is in me. I am doing better and better in my life with respects to prayer, faith, bible readings and testifying. I use the power of the Lord to get me through the trials and tribulations of this world. Just as soon as I start to feel better about my life, it seems, I start to get attacked from all sides and it drives me crazy. I am trying to remain patient and to count on the Lord’s protection and now I am having nightmares that cause me to be afraid to go to sleep. Now, I am tired at work and school. I will continue to pray and be faithful in the Lord because I have come to recognize the obstacles in my life as futile attempts by demons to make me stop believing or to tempt me to react in anger or revenge to the people in my life that cause opposition. But I will continue to live my life in peace and refuse to react in the way Satan wants me to react. I choose to live the way Jesus wants me to react.
Laila Hamideh

9 10 2009

simple…. resist the evil or satan… it will flee from u…. try to be perfect in all manners…. think n medidate on word of god….. don’t think much about satan…just aware of it… finally the best way of opposing is neglecting…. bye…. praise the lord…. jesus christ….

24 08 2007
cathy watkins

i am writing today about my 16 year old daughter .She is such a good girl but saten or his demons have attacked her all summer long she will feel good for a while and then she is just a trembling crying mess. she thinks shes losing her mind. He tells her she is serving him (not God) and now he is putting horrible cuss word in her head she has been rasied in church and is a christain. we have prauyed and prayed and dont understand why she is going through this I am a widow and have to work sometimes going to work on as little as 1 hour of sleep or less because she is scared when im a sleep. can u give some advise on how to deal with this. school has started and she is very miserable but is pushing herself to go anyway

6 10 2012

You and your daughter are very noble people. You are both pushing yourselves to continue on, and my senses tell me that you will over come all of this. I have been experiencing what feels like Satan’s work as well lately. I have prayed for both of you, and I believe that we have the power to remove the bad experiences from our lives and to feel confidence and happiness in the name of God.

24 08 2007
Donald B


I too have a 16 year old daughter. So, I can say that I have seen a lot of moodiness from her from time to time. However, it seems that what you are dealing with has gone a little further than simple moodiness.

As I am not a professional counselor and considering the fact that you are doing this as a widow … I would suggest bringing in outside resources to help you.

Are you in church? If so, talk with your pastor. Even better, speak with the youth pastor of the church. Don’t be hindered from reaching out to your church body due to fear of rejection or from worries about how you will be perceived. God put the church in place for times such as this.

Finally … persever in prayer! Ask others to pray with you. Reach out to the people God has placed in your life. Don’t let pride get in the way.

If you aren’t sure who to speak with, ask God. He will provide!

Go with God,
Donald B

17 09 2010

Greeting in Jesus Name,

Let me start off and say the Jesus died on the cross that we will have the victory. For many, many yearsI was torture, but thanks be to God in Jesus Christ he deliver me. You too can be deliver if only you believe.
PHILLIPIANS 3:19, EPHESIANS, 4: 23, 24, PSALM 119: 113, 114,115
MATTHEW 22:37, 1 CORINTHIANS 2: 16, ISAIH 26:3, ROMANS 7:25,

23 01 2008
Henry Carruthers -South Africa

I too have experienced these attacks!! ,its still happens quite often even in prayer !!and when i became reborn ,they suddenly appeared …started ,i too thought i might be going mad or that these thoughts were comming from me!

Tonight i went onto the net ,just to see if other christians might be experiencing the same attacks in the mind that i am experiencing ,i found enough …so many , there must be thousands ,millions ..i dont know how many. All i know is that there is a war going on ,and satan doesnt like me because i belong to the lord or any other of gods children.


Stand strong knowing that god is the VICTOR.

Praise God. -Henry Carruthers-South Africa.

29 03 2008

I too have been under these attacks. It all started when I decided to get closer to the Lord. That’s when doubts about God’s existance started coming to me. Then, doubts about Jesus. I finally came to the realization that I needed to get saved, and did.

That’s when the fireworks really started! The doubts still came, but then faded away. My battle is blasphemous feelings and thoughts. I say feelings and thoughts, because the thought seems to come through a feeling. It started when I would read my bible. I’m talking about disgusting stuff people, stuff like “Why do you need to worship God? He is full of Himself and power hungry” or “So your God’s child huh? Well you know how satan fell, and you’re going to do the same thing after you die and get kicked out of heaven”

Needless to say these thoughts scared me so badly and I just knew I was going to Hell. Then, God showed me beautiful things. I had a spiritual moment so real that my senses were sharper than they’ve ever been. All of nature seemed to amaze me, even the trees! All of God’s creation seemed to dance together and praise Him! It was the most beautiful experience of my life.

Then, after that mountain, I went back into the valley. Thoughts like @#$@# Jesus, or @#$@# God! Now I talked to my preacher, and he just looked at me like I was strange for having these feelings and thoughts. That just made me more scared and I felt like i’m possessed by a demon or something. However, I know that i’m not. Because I have felt the presence of Jesus with me at different times through all of this. I just refuse to believe the devil’s lies. I am a child of the King, bought and paid for with the precious blood of Jesus!

17 09 2010

Your’e not alone. God is with you. He loves you. This is the trick of the enemy. Brother God words are powerful, cleansing to the soul. I’ve went through a battlefield of the mind for years, but thanks be to God in Jesus name he deliver me. Finds scriptures pertaining to what you’re battling. Everyday quotes these scriptures as much as possible throughout the day. You’ll get the victory. There is power in the words – just believe. When satan come to try and discourage (which is his job) dont let fear defeat you. Remember God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind 2 Timothy 1:7. Trust in the Lord Jesus. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. (EPH 6: 12).
I’ll pray for you.

God Bless You,

1 08 2011

Hello Jason, your post brought me much happiness. I remember the day I was baptized vividly. My senses were sharpened as well. I was 15 years old and I remember exiting church afterwards and I experienced exactly what you mentioned before:

Then, God showed me beautiful things. I had a spiritual moment so real that my senses were sharper than they’ve ever been. All of nature seemed to amaze me, even the trees! All of God’s creation seemed to dance together and praise Him! It was the most beautiful experience of my life.

The grass and trees looked lushly green as if they were in HD before it actually existed. As many have stated before, it is important for us to not yield to the temptations of the flesh and continue to feed the spirit positive input. We must also keep in mind that others are often unaware of their involvement in the evil works they are performing. I am dealing with the demonic attacks just as everyone here and I’m drawing strength from all of you, Thanks.

4 08 2014

alright listen guys I got saved 6 years ago…… a mammas prayers were answered I should say God got me off of drugs and all types of sin…… when I got saved I struggled with the usual have I committed the unpardonable sin due to a blasphemous thought coming in my mind after reading Matthew 12….. I was raised in church since I was a young kid I was raised Pentecostal….. thank God for my momma who’s a hardcore Christian woman amen… long story short I knew God called me to be an evangelist

4 08 2014

I hear blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit 24 /7 they do not cease…. everything I thank on becomes blasphemous I cannot think of anything of God at times or if I do what I think on flips around and turns blasphemous.
I’ve been a Christian for 6 years this all started early October 2013 I no longer have a mod it is like it is demon possessed I feel I have blaspheme the Holy Ghost do to file ungodly sick demented twisted curse words towards the Holy Ghost in my mind

10 04 2008

I am going through the same thing right now. I have finally found a church where I feel at home. I’m dedicated to doing a bible study/journaling every day following along the reading plan of my church. Even though I look forward to it, when I actually sit down to do it my head will be filled with thoughts of “come on, let’s just go lay down. watching TV sounds like fun! want to go for a run? let’s get outside!” ANYTHING to get me away from my Bible. Once I actually start it goes away and I can finally remember that I really enjoy it.

I’m going to be baptized on Sunday. I can feel a presence that is trying to convince me to not do it. It’s something I really want to do! Usually when I get a really bad feeling about something I don’t do it. But this time I recognize that this doubt and fear are being amplified. There is a small part of me that is nervous about having that much attention on me, but that shouldn’t stop me from doing what I want to do!

8 05 2008

I am happy to report that my blashpemous thoughts and feeling have subsided; every now and then they seem to come back, though not as strong. However, I have a long history of pornography and lust, which satan tried to tempt me with a couple of weeks ago. I have been clean every since I came to Jesus, but then all of a sudden these powerful temptations hit me. “It right there on the PC” “Nobody will ever know” “God will forgive you” “Just one video won’t hurt”

I prayed and gave it to the Lord and you know what?…It worked. The devil fled and Jesus kept me from falling. I love Him so much. It reminded me of the verse where Paul said the Jesus would make us to stand. Praise Him!

8 05 2008

Demonic attacks are very real…as many have confirmed here. I’m going through some horrendous attacks…like Jason’s and worse.

DON’T own those thoughts Jason…they’re not yours…they’re from the enemy.. and he wants you to feel condemned about them… he’ll plant thoughts in our minds and then point an accusing finger at us about them to make us feel guilty….once again…don’t own them. These are one of many of the tactics of the enemies hordes.

Hang in there all.
Here’s a couple of very good sermons on this topic from Pastor Brian Broderson of Calvary Chapel-Costa Mesa. :





JASON… here is a quote/copy & paste from the text version of the sermon above….

“Charles Spurgeon, the great Victorian preacher, was plagued by these kinds of things, and so much so, that finally after a long struggle he went to his grandfather who was also a minister. And he confessed to him all of these evil thoughts that were running through his mind. And his grandfather said, “Let me ask you a question. Do you delight in these thoughts?” And he said, “No I hate them.” And his grandfather said, “Then don’t own them. They’re not yours. They belong to the devil.”
Have you ever been praying, and suddenly had your mind assaulted by blasphemous thoughts? Have you ever been worshipping and had pornographic images flash across your mind? Have you ever gone through a period of time when your mind was obsessed by deplorable thoughts, thoughts that sickened and oppressed you, thoughts that you longed to be delivered from? If so, know this, you’re not alone. Many of God’s faithful servants have experienced similar things. And you know, it just seems like in certain times this kind of activity is heightened.”


14 05 2008

I too suffer from these attacks.. They are extremely frustrating. I try to banish them, but they don’t budge. I trust you can imagine how painful, destructive (to one’s self), sickening and sinful they can get. After all, the extent the devil can go to is quite extreme. Thank God, I have my rock. My bible and the Lord help me get through it, which is a perfect counter to any intrusive thought I may experience. I would – in all honesty – prefer the devil to manifest and attack me that way, but instead – as you might expect – the most damaging and vulnerable part is struck.

I probably sound like a lunatic and if that is the case, then ignore me. I just thought I’d share my experiences. How ever helpful that is. ;)

14 05 2008
Donald B

JM …

Just don’t want you to feel ignored. You DO NOT sound like a lunatic. What I have learned is what you seem to have learned. The only way to find freedom from this kind of life is to completely give yourself to Jesus Christ and His will.

Go with God,
Donald B

3 06 2008

I find this blog refreshing. Beyond any doubt, it confirms that my struggles against the forces of darkness in this vane world are also the struggles of many. Thanks, and keep the good wordlk

8 06 2008

Ok yeah im only 15 and this is so weird.for 3 years me and 1 of my cousins(he is 14) have been talking and hanging out togather.he is christian and has been.well in in october 2007 some time ago he asked me if i was religous.i told him i believed in god and the devil and hell but didnt really pay attention.he explained many things and in great detail.i believed it all with no doubt and for some reason felt better knowing about that.a few months passed and we came to january of 2008.i was sitting playing crysis a pc game when a strange thought literaly showed up for no more than 2 seconds and was gone but the impact it left was really strong.it told me to hurt someone.it was weird because i never have even got in a fight with sombody in my life.innitialy i hated myself for it and went into a deep depression.4 days passed and i called my cousin and slowly got on that topic.and it was weird he said he gets them too.i innitialy thought against my original beliefs…it must be the games.but then i thought ok wait a sec.what are the odds of 2 people,not blood related,1 who has fought people before,and one that hasnt,and i dont know about him but i myself im easy going.

i came to two people.

a guy that is gonna be a psyciatrist told me that i had a free mind,i think it because im affraid to think it and i also have add so my thoughts race anyway so its simply amplified and if i dont want to do it i wont im in control.

my cousins mom says i need to read my bible more.

note.i believe it is either demons or satan heres why.im adopted so what are the odds id meet sombody else who has the same problem in the same family.and what are the odds i just became christian and other new christians too are having thought like problems.i think its our fears satan tackles i mean im not affraid of doubts or death.im only affraid of hurting people as ive always been very careful to others.

seriously scientific odds are too huge to put on this web page soo.i believe it must be a larger force.

17 07 2008

Hello, I am researching spiritual warfare for it seems to be a constant in my life.
I attend a wonderful church. It is very different from the one in which I was raised, but I believe that I am called to this church. Last night I was introduced to the idea that Satan wants to kill me! And that I need not make any decisions in my life, at this moment, because I am under attack. This is not the first time that Satan has sent his demons after me. I have had horrible incidences with him. What concerns me is the rest of my life. I am without work and cannot seem to find a job. I am in serious debt. I have gained tremendous weight. I am lonely because of my financial situation. And now this? I am not placing blame on Satan for my lack of income and work and I am the one that put fork to mouth too many times. But, Is it possible that God wants me in this situation? Could God want me here so that He can get my full attention? And, what can I do about this battle that I am under?

Thank you in advance for any advice that you may have.

15 08 2008

I just want to thank the Lord for you all, I have been under attack off and on for about a year, the enemy puts the worst thoughts in my head, things about my God and, my Jesus, and His precious Spirit, things that give me anxiety because I don’t want them in my head, the enemy tries to make me think they are me, he changes you into eyes and wispers in my ear, and I stress out, Jason I know how you feel when you said the thought and the feeling, I hate it, but when it starts to get bad I get mad, and I stand on the Word of God, and when you have done all you can do, just stand, please know that i am fighting the battle with you all, may the Lord Jesus fill you all with His spirit, and His love fill your hearts.

27 08 2008

Hi everyone,

I came to this site because I realized that I too have been under attack by demons. The other day, I was completely sinless for about 23 or so hours and was the closest to our Lord that I have ever been. Then, the next day I found myself doubting the validity of scripture, the existence of God, etc. My foundation was literally crumbling. I didn’t understand what was happening.

I prayed about it and realized that I was indeed under attack. I am so thankful for all of your testimonies. God bless all of you and I really hope that, with our Lord and prayer, these attacks will be less and less influential…

1 09 2008

Hello all,
Barry here again….I just wanted to submit a variation of one of the links I submitted earlier… being that I noticed that the “AUDIO” link isn’t working properly.

Here is a new link…it has the same “TEXT” sermon listed, but at the top of the page…in BLUE…are AUDIO links….for those who don’t want to read through the whole sermon, but would rather listen to it.

I’ll be praying for you all (some more)….and please do the same for me.

Be strong…persevere…God will deliver us.


2 09 2008
3 09 2008
Mary. F. Gwenhamo (South Africa)

Hello All

I was raised a catholic and I have been going to church my entire life. I however did not understand the point of going to church. I rarely prayed for myself nor read the bible. I basically I did not have a relationship with Jesus Christ. Now I am praying to receive Jesus in my life although sometimes I struggle with lack of faith. I have had Satanic attacks in my life but this time I believe that am under a serious attack. I have these very crazy thoughts telling me to do harmful things like hurting my two children and husband and some very very crazy things!!!!

When I read the bible and pray, I get some relief but this is usually short-lived. The evil voice usually comes back immediately telling me that I am Satanic. I try very hard to ignore it but I feel a lot of pain inside me. I am writing my Ph.D. in Economics and I can hardly concetrate on my work once these attacks begin.

Please fellow christians help on how to deal with my situation and how I can pray for faith. How I should make use of the sciptures to enhance my relationship with God.


3 09 2008

Hi Mary,

Yes, you are clearly under attack. You have to persevere and fight through.

I’ll be praying for you. The enemy’s laid various trips/wiles on me…and I persevered through them…and he’ll give up on those tactics once he see’s you are thoroughly no longer bothered by them…as horrible as they are…remember they’re his garbarge thoughts/suggestions, not yours!…so just rebuke him in your mind and persevere forward.

Listen to the audio sermon link I listed above. It’s helpful to hear a pastor, who’s experienced these things expound on it.

1 Peter 4:12 NRSV 12 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that is taking place among you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.

1 Peter 5:8-11 NKJV 8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. 9 Resist him, STEADFAST in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.

18 09 2008
Kim B

Oh my goodness! This may sound so weird, but here it goes. This blog was published in 2006 and here I am, TWO YEARS LATER, reading it.

The blog, has changed my day and hopefully my life. Recently, well, yesterday, I was attacked by Satan. He placed a thought inside my head that I would NEVER believe to be real, but I dwelt on his words and it ended up destroying my life…for a day. But when you’re in spiritual battle, a day feels like a life time, you know what I’m saying?! That one thought made me question and doubt everything about what God had been teaching me, and it really was a life reuiner.

But, searching for insight and wisdom, I asked God to forgive me for my thoughts, and you DONALD, God spoke to me through you. I also sometimes make little situations into giant ones and I beat myself up over it all of the time. It’s even worse because I am called to the mission field and believing the lies of Satan only made me feel worse.

i prayed the prayer you mentions half way through. For God to strengthen me and change me and to disciple me. It’s not easy for a 19 year old college student called to serve God with my life, but I am trying. I would like you to know how much I am thanking God for your words. They’ve really helped me through this.

Love in Christ

18 09 2008
Donald B

Kim B …

As you can tell by the comments in this blog, we are not alone. What I am learning more and more is that there is a simple way to overcome satan and his attacks. Simple to say that is.

The simple way is to get to know God more and more each day. If I can be disciplined enough to spend time with God everyday (sometimes, more time is needed than on other days), these attacks are a little easier to deal with.

I don’t believe they will ever stop … that is … at least until I get to heaven. But as they continue to come, I can come to know my God more and more everyday … and thus, minimize the effect of these attacks on my life.

I believe satan’s main desire is simply to get us to quit. He doesn’t want us telling people about Jesus, he doesn’t want us on the mission field, he doesn’t want us serving in our churches and so on. So he attacks us – is successful at times – and then rubs that success in our face to make us feel guilty enough or weak enough to give in and quit.

If we can only remember that our God loves us no matter what … satan will be overcome. Jesus wants us to succeed, and He will help us succeed. We just have to get back up after we fall down.

Go with God,
Donald B

1 01 2009

Hey all….here’s another good website I came across on this subject:


Stand firm!

In Christ.


15 01 2009

I have found Joyce Meyers book called Battlefield of the mind really amazing.
It will show you how to renew your mind and set yourself free with God’s help
There also needs to bea confession of your sin in your life and forgiving of those who have hurt you.The other thing to do is to renounce all ties to things you have done to give satan access to your life like visiting fortune tellers,doing drugs,porn,hypnotism etcAlso break any generational curses by praying the blood of Jesus over your family and yourself.Satan wants to destroy you and make you think you are crazy but Jesus wants to set you free and give you peace and liberty.
check out http://www.lpm.org.za for sermon notes on how to be free

27 02 2009

I am 19, in my first year of college, and recently born again Christian. I am ADD, my mind has always been a bit scattered. Only now, it seems to be an opening for the enemy. I know that forces other than that of god DO exist. The night I got saved, I stepped out of the car and started into my house. The minute I walked in, the air felt heavy. I could feel something not of god lingering around me. However, I took shelter in knowing god already fought the battle for me. Recently, actually as of last night, I have been bombarded with perverted words and thoughts that aren’t from me. I got 2 hours of sleep. I was up until 3 reading my bible. I finally fell asleep, only to wake up at about 530, once again flooded with these thoughts. I have a feeling this is only the beginning, but am believing that will deliver me, as he did a month ago. Your words give me hope. God bless you. -JadedSunshine

11 03 2009

Well, I have been reading this with great interest. I was raised a good little Southern Baptist girl, church is no stranger to me. I am a registered nurse and have worked extensively with psychiatric emergencies. It was during my time working at a state mental hospital in Chattanooga that really began to feel oppressed spiritually. I spiraled into a ravenous addiction to drugs, suffered some health problems, and literally felt the need to pray for protection. Now, I will admit that I obviously made some poor choices in friends, co-workers, etc. during this time in my life. But I never had addiction issues – I was married, had small children until then. Happy to say I have been clean for 4 years and am in a better place. A former youth minister suggested a book about oppression and I feel this is a real and dangerous threat. God Bless you & your sweet family – you do great work I’m sure. And thank you for your service to our country.

13 03 2009

Im not suicidal at all,but ;when I m in a high place like a big bridge or a high building or cliff, I become panicy to the point Im afaid I will jump to releive the panic.This has got to be satan making me think Im trapped and suicide is the only way out.I have always resisted but Im afaid someday ,in a moment of weakness ,I may actually jump

22 03 2009

the perverted thoughts r only the beginning. theres lots more. and its not easy to handle. it can be really really hard. I have learned a lot from demonic attacks.

17 04 2009

OK, here’s my story. I lead a Bible Distribution team in my church who go out regularly, door to door, and offer a family bible to the lost and unchurched families in our community. I find that during the period leading up to and for a period afterwards of the date we choose to do the distribution, a number of difficult things arise in my/our lives. Unexplained anger from family and friends, leading situations that entice you to make wrong choices, physical accidents, the list could go on. I found also that I am fighting a few large battles in my life that start to go off the rails during these times. Sometimes I attribute these things to just life happening but often the frequency with which they occur and the increase in numbers of these issues especially just before we go out makes me wonder….. There are some things that happen that are absolultely bizarre, such as errors made on important documents that directly affect my life and tempt me to be bitter. I try to talk with the Lord about this but sometimes I feel so empty inside. I hang on with my faith for dear life, however….

1 07 2009

Let me tell my story[i am very young by the way,even though this may be or sound long] Of course,i started out totally uninformed like everyone else,only praying in problems sin being nothing to me….. Then i moved to Florida….and i ended up going to church and that’s when things started up. After joining the church[there was a serious miricle incident in which the sun never looked bigger while i was going to(unwillingly) going to visit another church( i ended up turning around,back to the old church.....on time)] and getting baptised i started looking up and getting curious about the lord. Then i made an attempt to stop sinning…..altogether,simply asking for forgiveness when i do end up sinning[i am still doing this by the way,it's not that hard]. Then after this things seemed to be going very well…..but then i encountered some huge ”road blocks”,because basically[you may find this disgusting] i had been looking at porn[sometimes] and masturbating[very,very often pretty much daily or weekly if i was somewhere new/not home]. But i went around and knocked those blocks over[there were more than simply those two,believe me] and being a guy i had[as still do] have a problem with lust and committing adultery in my heart[read Matthew 5:28]. So then, trying to tackle these things i was able to identify my sins on the spot,ask for forgiveness and had a really good feeling for a while…..but then I got ”aroused” and masturbated one day,it wasn’t even worth it,and it happened again and I was really upset because I was deliberetely disobeying GOD and it gave me no gain,and it meant the devil and his demons still had me bound,and you cant go to heaven like that. Afterwards the devil and/or his demons [almost]TOTALLY destroyed my foundation and I was sinning left n’right,couldn’t pinpoint what sins I had done,I was praying less and my good feeling left and i felt really bad and dissapointed. So i got back on track[my good feeling never came back(as of today) though]. Then,everything changed.
Either the devil or his demons started attacking me,the whole day. I was ”aroused” that day so i knew the devil was going to play his ace,he[or his demon(s)] must have really tried that day because they had tried lust,lieing,bad thoughts,distractions…..everything. The devil even tried to make me masturbate & look at porn that day…..but i wasn’t going to let him win,I was more determined that time,so basically I put my hands on the cover,and tried to go to sleep. The devil tried a few failing tricks but i caught on to them fast enough[thanks to the lord of course!!!!]. Anyway the last thing he did was so slick,I almost fell for it

My hands got cold.

And i was just about to put them under the cover for warmth…when God came in and gave me the thought…..”If i put them under the covers….i know what’s going to happen. And thankfully there were a few more blankets right in front of me,so i put on over my hands and tried to go to sleep again.

Then the devil and his demons either gave up[don't really think so] or God came in,because my ”arousal ” went away by quite an amount and i finally was tired enough to get some sleep.
Well,today the devil’s demons attacked again,they were just less severe.

To everyone who’s being spiritually attacked,i say to you Pray for me and we need to also pray for each other….,ask God for help all the way through…and don’t let up,satan wants you to give up and be unhappy and despair and blame GOD but…

7 09 2009

Thank you Landis. I believe God has used your words to speak to me – “don’t let up, Satan wants you to give up and be unhappy and despair and BLAME God but… Keep Believing in God, Never Give Up on Him!!!!” I have struggled for years with suicidal thoughts that rise up in me due to what I take as rejection from those who mean the most to me – it once was my mother, now it is my husband. Are these people really rejecting me? No. For some reason I can’t handle disappointing them. It causes me to hate myself and makes me want to harm myself. I know that God has the power to brake any bondage to sin we have. I know the problem is never on God’s part but on ours. Today when I was tempted with self-destructive thoughts, I remember the thought coming into my mind “God has failed you. He can’t help you and it’s useless calling upon Him.” To my shame, I believed it. I know the wonderful things he is doing in my life. He has been such a friend and comforter to me. Guiding me and convicting me. Bringing victory in areas I thought I wouldn’t see. I was stuck in legalism all my life. Getting saved over and over again – thinking perfection was the key and if I wasn’t God must not love me. He has taught me I can’t earn God’s favor – even though I had heard it all my life. He can never love me more and He can never love me less. He also cannot not love me! He is such an amazing God. Worthy of all our praise. Since God has broke the chains of legalism in my life – I have experienced such a wonderful relationship with Him. Thank you Landis for your encouraging word. I was so wrong in allowing those thoughts in and knew I was. The problem I need to confront now is the suicidal thoughts. I know they stem from my selfishness. I care so much about what people think of me. I want God to deliver me so badly from my evil heart. I believe God is teaching me to never even trust myself. He says in his word the heart is deceitful so in remembering that – and taking the encouragement and rebuke(blaming God) from your words – I am going to seek God’s forgiveness and grace. I was trying to blame God for not helping me, but I am the problem for helping me. God is the solution for all our problems and all our needs. Never ever look to anyone or anything other than God and His word.

3 10 2009

For years now I have struggled with feelings of being rejected, judged, mocked, shunned, ignored, etc. by other Christians. I don’t feel this way around everyone. There are some christian people I feel very close to and accepted by. However, in every church, camp, or group situation there are always a few people who seem to act a certain way, sometimes just by a look, that makes me feel like they are accusing me of not being a Christian. I’ve read that others feel that Satan puts doubts in their heads as to their belief in Christ but I’m finding with me he is constantly using other Christians to create this doubt in me. I will think that if “God’s people” act this way towards me than may be it’s an indicator of how God feels about me. May be I’m not really a part of God’ family and that’s why these people are actting so cold. We are commanded to love the Lord our God with all our mind, soul and strength and to love our neighbors as ourselves. I have such a hard time with the 2nd part that I question my whole faith and whether it’s genuine. The hardest part is it sometimes seems like the people that appear to be the most spirtual are the ones that I get this vibe from. It also makes me wonder what I’m doing wrong. I know I’m not perfect but I not deliberatly living a life of sin. Lately I have just been meditating on Philipians 4 :8 and focusing on what that really means. I know that Satan has been using this to really keep me in bondage but sometimes it just all feels so real – that it is just because there is something wrong with me and I’m not part of God’ family.

10 10 2009

Hey Carol,

You are a child of God…..He loves you.

Like in high school…there’s always people who “hang out” with people in their “click”.
And yes, the enemy will use that to bring division and discouragement to a believer/believers….and make them think that they’re somehow outside the body of Christ….. don’t buy into that.

Fellow Christians should reach out to everybody in the body….so it’s probably them lacking in spiritual maturity…… just forgive them and pray for them and don’t hold it against them.

Love in Christ.


5 01 2010
Happy chick

Im 19 years old…and i must say that these thoughts are coming at me like darts.
I keep thinking about negative things …death, child molesters, sickness and so on……i was fighting social anxiety and now that i seem to be over that…here comes something else! Im so happy i found this blog!!! I feel so much better hearing from my fellow brothers and sisters in christ. Im thinking about these thoughts as i type and its just annoying. REMEMBER…NEW LEVEL NEW DEVIL AND WHEN THE DEVIL IS MESSIN’ HERE COMES YOUR BLESSIN’! WE MUST FIGHT! I REFUSE TO LET GOD DOWN. I LOVE YOU ALL! =)

9 02 2010
Jim S

I too have to deal with this enemy. Frustrating as it is, when he attacks me my thoughts go directaly to Revalation!

He laid hold of the dragon, that serpent of old, who is the Devil and Satan, and bound him for a thousand years; and he cast him into the bottomless pit, and shut him up, and set a seal on him, so that he should deceive the nations no more till the thousand years were finished.

This helps me to fight against him. Because I know that the cross is my sword and my shield!

Love to all

24 02 2010
Tiffany Zimmerman

Hello everyone! I don’t know how old this blog is, but I ran across it this morning as I, too, am dealing with attacks from the devil. I believe I came to this site as comfort in reading that I am not the only one. I am not going crazy, and neither are you!
I’m a born again Christian, 8 years now. My story is not easy, as none of ours are, I’m sure. The first few years of being a Christian, I sailed through with ease, without many trials or tribulations. Then 3 months ago, I started having panic attacks out of the blue. Severe ones, and crazy random thoughts that would scare the heck out of me. I’m not a violent, or angry person, and never have been. So you can imagine what these thoughts were doing to me. I thought I was having a mental breakdown or something. I was completely terrified.
I prayed, literally down on my knees, begging for God’s deliverance!!
My poor husband, thought I should perhaps seek some outside help. So reluctantly I did, and all those mental health specialists wanted to do, was put me on crazy medications, which I refused.
I finally relied completely on my faith in Jesus, and after about 3 weeks of this craziness, Jesus pulled me through and straightened out my thoughts. Ive been solid as a rock the last couple of months. Praise God!
I realize now, that those thoughts that scare us, aren’t OUR thoughts. They are placed there by the devil and his demons. These are thoughts that would never enter are heads on our own….but still scary nonetheless.
Good luck to you all, and keep your faith strong and healthy, so you will be able to stand against the devil’s schemes and tricks.
God bless

11 03 2011

You have written this message over a year ago and I come upon this blog not by accident. I have has Satan put awful thoughts in my head relating to death. I fill like I am in a spiritual battle. I am saved and I know since I have been getting closer to God and trying to clean out my life Satan is trying his hardest to destoy me. I thought I was going crazy and even thought I was going to end my life or hurt others which is not me!! These came on so suddenly and I have had some panic attacks because of it. It think Satan finds a weakness in us and starts his tormenting. I am not crazy. I pray for complete healing for myself.

15 04 2010
Jomo Merritt

What you said was right on the money particularly the selfish thoughts

15 04 2010
Gina Swan

Hello,I came across this website to make sure I’m not alone, I myself have been assulted in my mind by the enemy. I wanna make sure this is not me or my thoughts, Just 5 days ago after listening to the word and getting closer to God, I had a mind assult of blashpemous thoughts against the Holy one of Israel, our Precious
Jesus and the Holy spirit, and when It started, I thougt where did that come from. Then it only intesefied and it was screammin in my thoughts, like every other breath all I could do was plead the Blood of Christ Constnantly, and yell PRAISE, Praise Jesus! I was acting
erratic like throwing up my hands to praise jesus , my daughter was looking at me like what? It was physical I was Tired and deppressed, I would actually wake up with them cursing God in my mind. this is the 6th day and it is still lingures not as intensley though, This is very real. But now I know that yes others have experineced this too , OH Good im not alone. :2 Corinthians 2:11 says be ignorant not of satan’s devices . Next time This happens Im going to say like sprougen,OH ITS ONLY YOU. Im not afriad I will not be held accountable. NOw I can Help others who have these attacks, Glory Be To God

11 07 2012

Ms Hester

Hello to you as well my name is Brittãny and I have also struggled with the same thing in the past. About two years ago- 2010 I had the same thing happen to me. It lasted for about 2 weeks and it was horrible. I thought god must not want me and it made me really sad. I had consulted with somebody and they told me that it was an attack of the devil and that god loved me. She prayed over me after I confessed my sins to her and almost immediately I felt the spirit of peace that can only come from god come over my whole entire body. I felt so light like I was in space or something very weightless. Jesus loves us and I’m happy that I understand what he did for me on the cross.

19 05 2010

I’m glad to find this website, I’ve been looking for some confirmation that I’m not the only one. They say there’s strength in numbers. In the last 2 months, I have been getting closer to God than I have ever been before. I want to get closer to Him, I pray daily for Him to lead me and protect me. I am looking for the church that’s right for my family, I go to one every Sunday, until I find one that is right. Anyway, since I have gotten closer to God, I have been suffering terrible nightmares almost every night, waking up at 3 a.m. , terrified. I dream of possessed people who sometimes talk in languages I don’t know. In the last one, the possessed person made a direct threat to me about ending my life. It was very scary. I pray when I wake up. Sometimes I turn on the light for the remainder of the night. At times during the day, I have blasphemous thoughts toward God. I have had them before now, throughout my life(I am 29), and have always been deeply ashamed, never telling anyone. I thought I was horrible, I didn’t want to think those thoughts, and now I pray for forgiveness. After reading these posts I know, they aren’t MY thoughts…my thoughts are good, they are thoughts of how to please God and do His will…these blasphemous words are not mine. I know that now. And I am so glad to know, I hope if I pray enough and follow God they will stop. It’s like, someone said before, “New level, New devil”. I am now fighting the bad thoughts. When I try to follow God, sometimes I fight w/my husband more – and I don’t really WANT to fight!! So now, I refuse to. And it’s so much better, I will not give the devil what he wants. I talk to my husband about what’s bothering me now, and we get along, like we should. We get strength from each other. We are a team. I will not give in, I am determined. If I don’t want to do the right thing, I do it anyway. Hopefully, the nightmares will subside. I will pray for all of you on here, please pray for me as well. And if anyone has any suggestions for me, please let me know. I began wearing a silver bracelet w/crosses all over it. I wear it all the time, even at night. It made me break out in a rash on my wrist, but I won’t take it off. I was afraid for a while that maybe I was possessed, because of my horrible dreams, but I know now that I am getting closer to God and that is a threat to the devil and he is attacking me in dreams. But I am no longer afraid, remember, God won the war already!! =) I am so glad I found God! My life is so much better now!! God bless you all,

24 05 2010

Hey Elizabeth…

I’m so glad you found this site.
Yes, be strong…. don’t accept any of those thoughts from the worm, loser, devil.
I’ll be praying for you too. I suddenly felt compelled to re-visit this site to see if someone new had left a message…and wella! …here’s yours… see how God works! 1 Thessalonians 5:11> Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Here is a good sermon on this subject (“copy & paste” ) from the famous evangelist George Whitfield:

(2 Corinthians 2:11)
Satan’s Scheme #4 – Troubling the believer with blasphemous, impure, unbelieving thoughts. –
“Among all the schemes that Satan makes use of, “to get an advantage over us,” there is none in which he is more successful, or by which he grieves the children of God worse, than this fourth scheme, the tempting of us with blasphemous, impure, unbelieving thoughts; and sometimes to such a degree, that they are as tormenting as any instrument of torture.
Some people are apt to ascribe all such evil thoughts to the simple wickedness of man’s heart. But those who know anything of the Christian life, can inform you, with greater certainty, that for the most part, these wicked thoughts proceed from that wicked one, the devil; who, no doubt, has permission given him from above to test Christians, by trying to confuse and rattle our fleshly body, as he did Job’s, that he may, with secrecy and success, ruffle and torment the soul.
You that have felt his fiery darts, can attest to the truth of this, and can testify, how often he has suggested that you, “curse God and die,” and darted into your thoughts a thousand blasphemous and wicked suggestions, even in your most secret and solemn times of prayer. Even now, when you look back on these times of great temptations, it may cause your hearts to tremble.
But do not marvel at this, as though some strange thing was happening to you; for this has been the common lot of all God’s children. We read, even in Job’s time, “One day the angels came to present themselves before the LORD (at public worship), and Satan also came with them.” to disturb their devotions.
And do not think that God is angry with you for these distracting, though ever so wicked thoughts: No, He knows it is not you, but Satan working on you. Nonetheless He is displeased with, and will certainly punish him; yet he will both pity and reward you for not allowing the temptations to cause you to sin. And though it will be difficult to make persons in your circumstances to believe it is true; yet I do not doubt that you are more acceptable to God, when performing your holy duties in the midst of such involuntary distractions,…..”

Fight on!

Barry <

10 03 2014

I came across this blog a few days ago. I seriously thought I was losing my mind. I came back to the Lord and have been getting ever so close in the past several months. All of a sudden these blasphemous thoughts started popping into my head and I was like what??? I do NOT think that!! I did NOT say that in my head!!!! And immediately felt condemned and repented and it just kept coming, so much so that I felt I couldn’t even hardly pray for it wouldn’t stop and I have to keep saying Lord, You know I don’t believe that. I would never think that. I would never say that. I love You and I trust You and I follow You!! I have never felt so ashamed and so alone. I wouldn’t tell anyone because I felt like everyone would think I was crazy. I felt like they would look down on me, even tho I KNOW I didn’t put these thoughts there. I got to the point where I felt like I wanted to just give up because if it wouldn’t go away, what was the point? But then it hit me, I felt like it was the Lord tellin me no, that’s what satan wants. And I won’t give up. I will stand. I will fight. It isn’t as bad as it was, but for a few weeks now this has been happening to me. I am so thankful for the article and sermon you posted, and for this blog because I was at my wit’s end. I finally started searching to see if I was crazy. But the Lord led me to this. I am so thankful to know I am not alone, that I am not crazy. I am praying everyday all day to be delivered. God’s word says in Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
I am standing on this. I am standing on His promises that He WILL deliver me, that I am REDEEMED and that I am His child and nothing can separate me from His love. Any prayers would be appreciated. God Bless You!!

20 07 2010

Hello Everyone, the devil is on a major marketing campain to glorify vampires and warewolves. Young girls are reading books like Twighlight then from there go into other dark books about evil. It seems innocent at the time but its not. My 14 year old stepdaughter got so into these books that it opened the doors of evil to come into our home. Her mother found her diary and read it. What was inside was a suicide note and pages and pages of her saying how much she hurt and felt attacked by darkness and her head was filled with evil thoughts. She says that it feels good to put a blade to herself and cut. She says she is a cutter. In the Bible it says that its the custom of demons to cut themselves. I feel so guilty that I allowed this to happen under my own watch. I take all the blame because Satan attacked me first. As the leader of this family I failed them by not instilling Gods light into my home and going to church and reading the bible and setting a good example and showering the child with love. I just know that this is happening to so many other families judging from the popularity of vampires. Please Please dont let this happen to you. In a way I feel that because of this happening it opened my eyes and changed me from a fake christian to knowing what I have to do and stay focused. Everything happens for a reason and you just have to notice how God works in your life. So my battle is just begining. Everyday is a struggle. God bless you all and if you can please pray for me and my family and I will do the same for yours.

3 08 2010

How random.

I believe this website was brought to me by God. My mind has been wandering for months if I was the only one going through experiences as such. Never have I been baptized or really “been into” God. Sometimes, i even gave up on him. However out of honesty, he has been there through my most worst times in life to show me that he is real & to have faith. So, since those two major incidents. . I believe someone is up there watching over us. But never did I ever fail on thinking that someone is down there as well. I dont belong to any religion as I would say, i’ma believer. Never more than that. Randomly would I go to church, but not a big deal. However, in April. . I began seeing black shadows that followed me and were in my room. Scared me for 3 weeks. I even went to see a mexican witchcraft person to see what it was. What he told me was shocking and I was amazed. However after that, a week later. . everything stopped. I began sleeping well. I felt brand new. Now, I wouldn’t say..I ran to jesus at this point cus I didn’t. I just would sleep with a rosary next to me. So. this all ended in early May. Its the beginning of August. & it started back up again. =( HOWEVER. This time I feel that there’s a reason why all this is happening. One of my fellow friends who believes in God and does the whole nine yards have been talking to me about Jesus. & start believing in his words, etc. This weekend I was suppose to go to church, but I FORGOT what day it was. When it finally came to me, I realized it was Sunday. So, I went to a church in a local neighborhood to pray. I prayed, talked, lit a candle. . . and that was it. I felt great, afterwards.
Then, everything began last night. I could of felt the enemy sleeping behind me, but there was no way that i could turn or talk. I was “stuck at this point.” & I felt my bed moved and he played with my hair. Then all of sudden i was able to get up, that I ran for the lights. & started to pray. He kept doing noises last night. & i just kept praying. I would honestly say, that he kept interrupting me while I read. & even when i began to pray, i just fell straight to sleep which is weird cus its really hard for me to do that. This morning I woke up, scared..lost. & I looked for a website so I wouldnt feel alone. & I wouldnt feel like i lost all my marbles. Cus no one in my family believes me. However, i feel better that im not alone during this experience. & that i havent completely lost my mind. This blog is so ancient. But I still just wanted to comment it. Thanks for whoever read this. & AMEN. GOD BE WITH YOU.

16 08 2010

Hi I too suffered these attacks for a peiod of time till the lord freed me thats not to say satan doesnt try but he has lost his power to condem and trick me. To Make me think i was the one who was thinking these discusting thoughts and i was going to rot in hell for having these thoughts.I was so scared i got vey deperessed and anxious I thought there was no way i could ever get out of this situation which again was the accuser and I was alone nobody else gets this problem just me.On top he told me you better check yourself into a mental home your CRAZY.I was so scared and even thought about ending my life i never would but i thought about it.Then satan would say well if you wont end your life i will kill you you cant control your thoughts i will take over your body too and throw you off a building i was a wreck.I called my Nana who has been a christain for 0ver 40 years and very familiar with satans ways.She told me satan is not allowed to touch my WILL even god doesnt touch our will that is who we are otherwise we would just be robots.She told me he cant take over me and gave me psalm 119 :133-134 To keep as a promise and god always honors his promises if we recieve it and believe it .I must mention i never got these attacks till i was baptised 1 week later the attacks begain.My only comfort was to get on my knees and pray evry morning lunch time and before bed.Then i was in bed one night reading the word and god gave me romans to read the words never stood out to me unitl that day he opened my heart to recieve it .Paul speaks of how we are no longer bound by the law but the grace of god and he did not know that coveting was a sin but when he found out all of a sudden all these covetous desires grew in him.It is our fallen nature you see all we want to be before god is pure and satan knows this so while we are in a fallen flesh we will always be flawed but thats why jesus was sent once we accept him we are forgiven and he doesnt condem us we condem ourselves which is what satan wants.Because if we condem ourselves in turn we are saying jesus salvation is not enough to cover us. So you see satan lost his power at the cross we no longer come under the law but the grace of god and if you realise we are not condemed for a thought even if satan plants it there or not he loses his power we are no longer bothered by the thoughts and satan stops using that tacktic we must still repent if we know something we did was wrong but our thoughts are out of our hands and the lord knows he sees our battle and understands THE BLOOD OF JESUS HAS COVERED US FOR ALL THE SINS OF THE PAST AND FUTURE.
I hope like i did through this trial you get closer to the lord and learn more form his word thats why he allows his children to go throught his trial to press into him and to help others when you get past it you will grow stronger and remember the lord will never test you beyond what you can handle you can handle it just pray and push into him.

16 12 2010

Here it is, years later, and I’ve read this blog as well as all the comments many times, over and over. God has certainly led me here earlier in my trial, as I was in deep despair over the mind attacks of the enemy, and thought i was completely alone, and going crazy. The enemy and his demons are very intricate and detail and very clever in trying to make you believe that the thoughts they infiltrate you with are your own, to cause you to go crazy and self destruct. But Praise God, he led me to this site, where i was able to recognize that i WAS NOT ALONE, and that the demons are hard at work with Christians all over the world. Like many of you, my attacks began immediately after I decided to give my life to Christ. I am 25 years old and was raised in church, but as my teen years entered i left the church and went to do my own thing. I partied hard, drank, had an addiction to pornography and was extremely lustful. Once i decided to give all that up, the enemy was furious. No sooner than when i said the words, “God I’m done with this I give my life to you” (I had been convicted many times months before i finally made my decision), than the enemy began attacking me with horrible disgusting horrifying thoughts about myself and my own 6 year old daughter. He tried many thoughts to get me to think that i was being lustful and to try to get me to hurt her, and to cause or relationship as innocent mother and daughter to ruin. My daughter is and always has been my life, and the enemy knows that. If he could get me to go crazy over hurting her, he knew i’d attempt to kill myself. which i did try, and thought of day after day…UNTIL, I REALIZED WHAT WAS GOING ON!!! Nothing the pastor of my church or anything anyone else could say to me was of any relief, because i didnt understand the enemy and his tactics. people i talked to didnt seem to understand the exact sistuation, their trials were all different, physical trials, not too much mind battle stuff. But, I began my research…both in the WORD of GOD and online, to see just how many people were being attacked, and here you all are. Thank God that we are not alone. Satan attacks because we are dedicatinmg our lives to his enemy, he hates Jesus, and will fight us to the death. But DO NOT OWN ANY OF THOSE THOUGHTS, THEY ARE NOT YOUR OWN!!!! THEY ARE TO DECEIVE YOU, TO GET YOU ON MEDICATION, TO GET YOU INTO A MENTAL HOME, TO RUIN YOR LIFE. God has been opening so many doors for me I love hi so much, that its no wonder im being attacked. I know my power in Christ, and this is exactly what the enemy was trying to prevent, a successful testimoy, to help uplift other believers. I know that the battle is NOT OVER, but I do know that its ALREADY WON!!! my God is an awesome God…keep focused and steadfast on him, his word, and stay encouraged by the testimonies of others, and he will flee. HE HAS NO CHOICE, HES NO MATCH FOR GOD, HE HAS TO ASK PERMISSION TO BOTHER US….GOD CAN LET THE EENEMY TEMPT US, WHILE GOD IS USING THIS AS A TEST FOR HIS PURPOSE. BE STRONG, AND THANK GOD FOR SAVING YOU!!!!

24 01 2012

You know what you need to do? Play Dr Mario and imagine all those viruses being destroyed are Satan’s minions as you bring light into the world.

16 12 2010

Here it is, years later, and I’ve read this blog as well as all the comments many times, over and over. God has certainly led me here earlier in my trial, as I was in deep despair over the mind attacks of the enemy, and thought i was completely alone, and going crazy. The enemy and his demons are very real, intricate in detail and very clever in trying to make you believe that the thoughts they infiltrate you with are your own, to cause you to go crazy and to self destruct. But Praise God, he led me to this site, where i was able to recognize that i WAS NOT ALONE, and that the demons are hard at work with Christians all over the world. Like many of you, my attacks began immediately after I decided to give my life to Christ. I am 25 years old and was raised in church, but as my teen years entered i left the church and went to do my own thing. I partied hard, drank, had an addiction to pornography and was extremely lustful. As a woman, who deals with pornography? That was unheard of by a lot of people….but i am not afraid to admit it, which Satan also hates. I’ve pulled the veil from over my eyes, and other people who may also be going thru the same thing, but are afraid to talk about it. The enemy loves when we isolate ourselves from other believers, especially if our battle is a hard one, because we wont get encouraged. But Once i decided to give all that up, the enemy was furious. No sooner than when i said the words, “God I’m done with this I give my life to you” (I had been convicted many times months before i finally made my decision), than the enemy began attacking me with horrible disgusting horrifying thoughts about myself and my own 6 year old daughter. He tried many thoughts to get me to think that i was being lustful and to try to get me to hurt her, and to cause or relationship as innocent mother and daughter to ruin. My daughter is and always has been my life, and the enemy knows that. If he could get me to go crazy over hurting her, he knew i’d attempt to kill myself. which i did try, and thought of day after day…UNTIL, I REALIZED WHAT WAS GOING ON!!! Nothing the pastor of my church or anything anyone else could say to me was of any relief, because i didnt understand the enemy and his tactics. People i talked to didnt seem to understand the exact situation, their trials were all different, physical trials, not too much mind battle stuff. But, I began my research…both in the WORD of GOD and online, to see just how many people were being attacked, and here you all are. Thank God that we are not alone. Satan attacks because we are dedicating our lives to his enemy, he hates Jesus, and will fight us to the death. But DO NOT OWN ANY OF THOSE THOUGHTS, THEY ARE NOT YOUR OWN!!!! THEY ARE TO DECEIVE YOU, TO GET YOU ON MEDICATION, TO GET YOU INTO A MENTAL HOME, TO RUIN YOR LIFE. God has been opening so many doors for me I love him so much, that its no wonder im being attacked. I know my power in Christ, and this is exactly what the enemy was trying to prevent, a successful testimony, to help uplift other believers. I know that the battle is NOT OVER, but I do know that its ALREADY WON!!! my God is an awesome God…keep focused and steadfast on GOD, HIS WORD, and stay encouraged by the testimonies of others, and satan will flee. HE HAS NO CHOICE, HES NO MATCH FOR GOD, HE HAS TO ASK PERMISSION TO BOTHER US….GOD CAN LET THE ENEMY TEMPT US, WHILE GOD IS USING THIS AS A TEST FOR HIS PURPOSE. BE STRONG, AND THANK GOD FOR SAVING YOU!!!!

28 04 2011

satan is like a painted whore beckoning you to destruction and filth; beware he is round the corner and what more he is clever

6 07 2011

i am getting lots of problem from the satan..its attacking me again and again…before i used to go church every weeks but now i cannot because of time…as before i used to get scare of my face seeing on mirror,used to feel like de cat pass near from me ..,used to feel bite wid my teeths,sometime i used to feel someone is strike inside me,thats not me.. and used to scare too!!
its happening again wid me …sometime i really feel to leave this world..i really dont knw wht should i do??

7 07 2011


I have also been going crazy over the past few days, having such demonic thoughts to the point where i was convinced i was losing my mind and going straight to hell. it even got so bad to the point where I could not hold a decent conversation without trying to silence the blasphemous thoughts in my head. its so comforting to know after reading all your posts that I am not accountable for these thoughts and that i do not have to own them.

I am still fighting so please pray for me…

10 03 2014

Hi Cherry. Praying they finally quit for you as it is three years later almost. I know what you went through. Because for me it has been the same. I never knew this could happen. But praise GOD He led me to this to see I am not alone. I can hardly work, talk to people or anything because it got so bad. I am so glad I am not alone but in the name of JESUS we are delivered!!!

16 07 2011

Praise to God, I’m visiting the site again…everyone please continue to stay prayed up and don’t give the enemy any room …even if the attacks slow down fir a while it’s easy to become complacent and forget about the attacks, but don’t!!!! Dint give the enemy any room…I slowed down a bit and here he is back again…but good thing Jesus will never leave nor forsake us!!!!

27 08 2011

Satan attacks me too. I know because I feel like the attacks are overboard in meaning and do not come from me, like they make no sense, but yet they try to make sense in my mind and are just so over the top it makes me crazy and they just go on for so long. Then once that one is done a new one creaps in to try and get me crazy. I know God wants to help me and Jesus wants to save me from these thoughts in my mind and I have to read my bible and pray more to help this stop more in my life.

30 09 2011

Satan is like a child, he wants what he can not have, the the more you pray, read the Bible,and do Gods work, the closer to God you get, the more distance is between Satan and you, may sound odd but if Satan is attacking you good for you, you are not cold or luke warm

18 10 2011
God Believer

I think we are millions around the world fighting against the satan and his evil tricks. Sometimes, the thoughts satan puts into my mind during my prayers, are extremely disgusting. Sometimes, I do panic, sometimes i want to cry, but with the blessings of God, I continue to pray. Dear friends, thank you for your comments as they have made my faith in God stronger.

You may tempt us satan, but the day will come when God will decide to destroy you. But God is great…If on that day, satan asks for forgiveness, God will forgive him because God is above all.

24 10 2011

God is going to damn satan and all his demons…. and praise God for this…I hope I’m there to witness it.

24 10 2011

Hey all…..here’s a good video from a really good well known pastor on this subject…. the main part / subject …the part that we deal with from time to time…is about a third of the way through the video.

Hopefully this will encourage you all….fight the fight.

Click here / or copy and paste into address bar :

9 11 2011
God Believer

Once upon a time, there was a man who decided to keep one month fast. But on the first day, while he was praying, bad thoughts came into his mind. The man felt guilty and thought he did not deserve to pray. As days passed by, the man realized that the satan was attacking him as the latter wanted him to fail.

But the man continued to pray, morning and evening. Finally, one day the satan appeared in his dreams and told him: ” I am part of you. No matter how much you pray, I will always be part of you.”

The man smiled and replied: “If you are part of me, this means everytime I pray and pay respect to God, you also do it. If you are part of me, then everytime God showers his blessings on me, you also receive it.”

24 01 2012

Eh. Just like the old testaments. “You reap what you sow”. Satan planted bad thoughts to get you to reap bad fruit.

7 12 2011

Just found this blog incidentally as I typed in for search of how to ask God and came up this as one among. I live in Indonesia, where here, problems come not only for non believers, but let say, those who say are believers contribute 50% of daily struggles get harder and even worse. Well, I complained at first but now seems don’t even care about them.

Anyway, I just want to say its good to have found this blog and hope there’ll be more things to share in.

18 12 2011

1 Peter 5:8
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

10 And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 11 To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

24 01 2012

I was in your position for a very long time too and I will scream and yell at Jesus for all my problems and setbacks but then I am slowly realizing he does not want me to do too much too fast.

While the bible does not state this in black and white there are hints scattered through out that quite a few of us may be fallen angels.

It said in the bible that 1/3rd of the angels rebeled against God and we may be those in *human form* and now that we try to get closer to God Satan does not like that so Satan will play with our ego’s to get us to screw ourselves.

He (Satan) wants us to be his property to do what he pleases and if we fight the herd we will attract negative attention from Satan.

In short it’s like a stage curtain slowly rolling upwards in which the brighter the light the darker the shadows are to swing us from one polarity to another.

Want to know the secret? Well too bad you’re going to know it anyways1 Mwa ha ha ha ha! What?

I believe the key secret is to still continue to do positive things but NOT attract more attention then you/we can handle like if you/we are not yet comfortable to do missionary stuff then do not go banging on people’s doors shouting about Jesus or you will attract spiritual attacks to get you to doubt yourself/ourselves.

If that happens it will be a 1 step forwards 3 step backwards sort of deal in addition to repealing spiritual protection.

24 01 2012


All that hard work of asking God to help you in creating mental barriers to protect against the evil energies will be flushed completely down the old crapper unless you do things slowly but steady.
Very much like http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Tortoise_and_the_Hare

“Slow but steady wins the race”.

If you try to do too much at once even if it’s in the name of The Lord you are sacrificing your health and safety which God does not want and The Devil loves.

Jesus said he comes not to bring peace but a *holy* sword as he will wipe out the enemies who have no hearts to repent their wicked way and their trespassing.

24 01 2012

My biggest problem is having patience when people misunderstand me or do not wish to understand about taking the middle ground so I will wind up looking like them.

24 01 2012
Donald B

Kyle … I’m going to leave your comments because you’re not a mean guy (from the sound of your comments), and … this is a view I have never heard anyone express before (speaking about the fallen angel part). I do somewhat like your position on the slow and steady though.

As the owner of this blog I just want to state that I cannot agree with Kyle’s fallen angel theory. I believe the fallen angels are demons that work with satan to accomplish his work of separating people from God.

As stated earlier though … I’m going to leave Kyle’s comments for others to read and think on.

Go with God,
Donald B.

24 01 2012

Not to offend anybody. But this is a serious topic and very real.
I think anybody posting here needs to contemplate what they are going to post for all to see. We have to realize that non-believers who don’t experience these things (the enemy doesn’t attack people who are lost–not in the same way at least) might stumble upon this website and are already viewing the legitimate real accounts/statements as at least somewhat bizarre. We don’t want this real battle that born again Christians experience (to some degree or another) be mocked upon and dismissed because of rash statements posted here.
Just my 2 cents.

24 01 2012
Ashley Neal

agreed…this is difficult enough as it is.But I have to tell all of you…its been nearly a year since I last posted and GOD is soooo good. Keep pressing in and leaving these things in his hands and he WILL see you thru….easier said than done i know but GOD OH GOD hear our prayers and touch the hearts of my brothers and sisters! Help them to access the peace of your holy spirit that theymay walk upright, heads held high and continue to dismiss sick, perverted and sometimes blasphemous thoughts from their conscious minds….we love you Lord Jesus, and we need you! Amen.

17 04 2012
janet guzman

I was recently born a christian and now Im experiencing demonic opposition, althought my faith remains strong, i will like advise on how to fight this demonic attacks, I have been in two car accidents in less than a week , please write back.

18 04 2012

Hello Janet,

You have got to pray without ceasing, and always no matter what remember that what you are going through is always an attack. As Don B stated in an earlier post, some things are just consequences of the sinful world that we live in, but much of it, especially when the attacks are in the form of thoughts, etc, are attacks right from the pit of hell.
Do not give up, stand strong in your faith and perservere no matter how difficult. Plead the Blood of Jesus over your life every morning that you wake up and every night that you go to sleep.
Remember, the enemy is out to seek, to kill and to destroy…and if he can take your life in an accident so that you are one less serving God, he will try. But pray to our Father, and he will protect you!
I agree with the above scripture, read it, meditate on it, sew it into your heart.

17 04 2012
janet guzman

I am glad I found this site

17 04 2012

Hello sister Janet,

Are you experiencing attacks in the form of thoughts or just bad situational things going on, like the auto accidents ….?

At any rate…I would just like to reiterate the Scriptures I posted prior for encouragment from 1 Peter :

“..Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

10 And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 11 To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

25 06 2012
Joe corner

I beleive that you are are right , thank you for being a truthful and real approach to battleing evil forces. Too often there is no good advice on this gushing 3 ft pipe of sewage used for doing the deceivers work rather than Gods word, called the Internet .

28 06 2012
Joe corner


20 07 2012

I just wanted to say im a true beliver and this helped encourage me. I deal with the same things i hope everyone can continue to share their struggles with more of us!

8 08 2012

Glory be unto God the Father, and Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Saviour Who washed us in His Blood and cleansed us from all iniquity and unrighteousness, making us acceptable unto Himself, and Our Holy Father, The Lord God Almighty, Whom Glory and Honor, Praise and Peace, with Love, be unto forever, Amen.

To my fellow Brothers and Sisters in the Lord, watching and waiting for the Faithful return of The Lord Our Righteousness, Jesus Christ.

You are not alone, I have been, and am tempted and tested in all points as you are, suffering from the unimaginable, fighting the spiritual battle that is being waged against us from the forces of evil.

All of us have been called by The Lord God Almighty, in His Son Jesus Christ, to fight this battle, the battle between good and evil. All of us, whom the Lord has saved and quickened in these last days. I write nothing new to you, but rather to encourage you in the Lord, we must put on the full armour of God, as did our brothers before us, even our brother Paul, the Apostle.

We must get armed with Truth and Righteousness, the Gospel of Peace, and Faith, the Salvation of our Lord, and The Mighty Wonderful Spirit of God.

Take comfort to yourselves that all of us, though we be separated in the world, we are One and together in the Body of Christ, we are all fighting together, and the adversary has come against all of us in much the same way. But hold fast and true to the Lord. He that begin a good work in you would finish it. Jesus, Christ, Our Beloved is with us. And He knows us, even when the enemy tries to deceive us.

Jesus, Christ, My Beloved Lord, Our Beloved Lord is coming for us, He’s coming to redeem his church. Stand fast and be ready. Those that endure to the end, the same will be saved.

Jesus will not leave us. He sees what’s going on, and what His church is going through, standing against the forces of darkness. Jesus Is Lord! He is with us always. But we must stand in Faith, in Prayer, in Worship of The Lord God Almighty, and Our Saviour, in fastings we must stand, in mercies, in patience, in meekness, in humbleness, in love. Doing all that we can to stand, that in the day of judgment, we may be counted worthy of the Lord. To be unto Him a people forever.

When the enemy starts to try to put horrible thoughts in my mind, I call out to Jesus Christ and to the Lord God Almighty with faith and love, being washed in the Blood of Jesus Christ. Knowing that The Lord’s Blood is sufficient to wipe away all sin, and to cure His flock of all unrighteousness and iniquity. I talk to the Lord, my Lords, of His love for me and my love for Him, and that those thoughts are not mine. For God knows me and knows my heart, and all the intents of my thoughts, even to my soul. He knows how much I want to be with Him, and to spend all eternity with Jesus. But some of us must labour to enter into His rest, some may suffer to enter into His rest, others may simply believe and enter into His rest. Seek the Lord, talk to Him and find out what has been determined for you to enter into His rest. However we enter, we must enter.

Keep God’s Commandments, abide In Jesus Christ, and the Grace, Love and Peace of God, the Father, and Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Saviour be unto you all, Amen

I’ll be praying for you, and pray for me. Your sister in Christ

8 08 2012

Wow! …that was awesome Lisa! It was like and epistle! amen! Thank you for your encouragement…
Your brother in Christ ..in the battle …


9 08 2012

Praise be to The Lord God Our Father and Christ Jesus, Our Lord and Saviour, for giving me what to say to encourage any one of the sheep in His little flock. By myself I am nothing and am confounded, and am incapable of any good deed.

Though I thank you Brother Barry for sharing your thoughts and experience in this battle, as all others here on this blog. You all have greatly encouraged me in my struggles. I at first thought myself alone in some specifics of this spiritual war. But I see that I am not. When the battle was sore against me, and I cried out to God, to Jesus Christ, to my Lords, to comfort me concerning this thing, the Lord led me here, to this site, to see that there are others like me, suffering from many of the same specifics as I am.

I drew strength from your stories, and thank my God, Our Holy Father, and Jesus Christ, Our precious Lord, I thank my God that I’m not alone. And I rejoiced in the Lord that I have you all in this fight with me. Knowing this, I pray to the Lord that He deliver all of us from this present evil.

It is not easy to talk about these things Brother Barry, It is not easy at all, but together we bear one another’s infirmities, and we suffer together, even long suffering, knowing that the things we suffer are not to be compared to the things that we will inherit in Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Saviour.

So thank you Brother Barry, and all of you, for your strength gives me strength, and this is a gift from God, and the work of Our Lord Jesus Christ, that we strengthen one another, edify each other, exhort, and suffer long with one another. Waiting for the faithful promise of Our Lord Jesus Christ, Whom glory be unto forever.

Peace and Love be unto you Brother Barry from the Lord God Our Father, and Jesus Christ, Our glorious Lord, peace and love be unto all the faithful brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ. May the Lord comfort your hearts and give rest unto your souls concerning this matter.

I’ll pray for you, and pray for me, I need your prayers.
Your sister in Christ

3 09 2012
Fred Nichols

I have been having satan attack me also, I have been praying and seeking the lord with all my heart. Every time we get ready to go to church, I feel such anger and resentment, almost a hatred, come on me. I know it is the enemy coming against me because I know he doesn’t want us going to church. I am a christian, I got saved in 1982. The Bible tells us to resist the devil and he will flee from you. When I feel the attack coming on, I tell it, I resist you, you can’t operate in me, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ get thee hence. It took me a while to figure out what was happening, I thought it was me at first. I would tell everyone, have faith and depend on Jesus to help you. Remember the enemy is defeated already by what Jesus did on the cross. He can’t hurt you unless Jesus is willing that he hurt you. Stand strong in Gods promises to you, and the power of Gods might!

24 09 2012

Yeah Fred…that’s one of his many, many tactics…

Just an update for all…here’s a more thorough sermon of one listed before…make a point of keenly listening to the last third of the sermon…

[audio src="http://resource.cccm.com/media/backtobasicsradio/radio/BT3098.mp3" /]


2 10 2012

I feel like I’m fighting a battle every day. I am trying to be close to God and fight to be the person I want to be. I am getting attacked daily in so many ways. My kids get some of it at school and around our neighborhood. I can only believe that Satan attacks them because of me, he knows that is the easiest way to get to me. My finances are being attacked also and I’m falling behind on things quickly…to the point that my family could be homeless within the next month. I get the mental attacks too, but most of them are real physical attacks on things that prevent us from living life. My kids can’t play outside anymore because the other kids hate them. I’ve pulled my youngest child out of school because he is bullied so much. My husband works hard and we struggle to make it pay day to pay day. We are facing losing our home at the end of the month and I just found out this afternoon that I may lose my car if I don’t make 2 payments on it this month. I KNOW it’s Satan creating these obstacles for my family. We did just fine before I REALLY started accepting God in my life. I used to blame God for all the bad things that happened, but now I realize it’s always been the devil and his demons getting me to do what he wanted.

Now that I have realized WHO is behind all the bad stuff happening to me and my family, how do I stop it? I pray all the time and I know God is working in my life, but I am so scared that we are going to lose everything and not have a place to live anymore. I realize that it’s just a house and just a car…material things, but without them, what will we do? We can barely keep food on the table. I just don’t understand it all. My husband makes a good wage, we should have enough to make it, but something always happens and it’s slowly taking our life away piece by piece. There are some days when I wonder if I wouldn’t be better off dead, maybe my family would have a chance to live in peace again. I need these attacks to stop! How do I stop them? Someone please help me. I feel like I’m going crazy.

10 01 2013

Admiring the persistence you put into your site and detailed information you present.

It’s nice to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t
the same old rehashed material. Wonderful read!
I’ve saved your site and I’m including your RSS feeds to
my Google account.

23 05 2013

I am new to this site first of all hello everyone!!! :D GOD BLESS YOU ALL , I had to register but can I ask you all a question pleaseeeeeeeeeee! PLEASEEEEE bless xx much love and kindness :D

20 06 2013
Roger Sands

10 years ago there was a girl I liked once and I didn’t realized I loved her after I found out how many people she slept with, which broke my heart into many pieces (I was only a christian for about 7 months, then). The sad thing is I never told her how I felt bc I’d only come across as offensive or obsessive. As years went by, she was, constantly, in my mind. Eventually, I left her a message or two, where I did get a reply saying how she use to like me, too but also that she was sad during that time. However, she also contradicted her statements saying how she was sad but also insinuated she wanted to do those things. Either way, it still broke my heart. Regardless I did wish the best for her. Still, my heart felt I had to be fully honest on saying the rest. So, a year or 2 passed by and I finally let it out the rest but no reply. She def got the message but I’ll never know she read it or not. Regardless, it’s the closest thing I had or could do in order to move on. Sure, I was in love with her but it died over time (which was painful). At least, I know what love feels like or could do to a person. She wasn’t a christian, then, of course but this doesn’t excuse how I still felt. Feelings are feelings and this would make sense if I did go out with her but I never did.

My question is this: How do you explain to a guy like me who never went out with her, never kissed her, never went out on a date, still wrestles with this pain, till this day? Def, I can say, it isn’t as harmful as it use to be but some mornings I wake up with that past haunting me. Is it something I’m missing or is it the enemy attacking me? I wrestle with this, often and I keep praying and asking God for the answer. I don’t expect to hear the best answer but, at least, an answer that can make me understand why I went through it (or, perhaps, still am?). Some days, I regret how I could live my life, differently but other days I think the opposite.

I would love to believe that I’m not in control and that God meant all this to happen for his reasons. Again, I will not understand everything about God but in order for me to live in peace and treat people, peacefully, I must come to understand this situation. I’m sure this isn’t something you hear often since the relationship/break up makes more sense but it has afflicted and hurt me.

…I hope I’ve made some sense. Take care and God Bless.

20 02 2014
Chris Green

Dear Roger, your account moved me to reply. Firstly May the love of Jesus help you with this and I will pray for you . I have had similar experiences where the past has haunted me because I wished so hard that I had done/said something different. I have had more success recently this year in dealing with it and would like to pass this on to you.

You have to accept there’s nothing you can do to change what happened and what I did was to pray about it ,secondly I threw myself into life by getting out and meeting new people ,taking on volunteer jobs and keeping myself as busy as I could be -because I found that the busier you can be with praying,friends,reading books ,sport etc- in a little while you find yourself dwelling less and less on past hurts(because your brain is choc a bloc just too busy with the present ) until you find that you can cope more and more with the pain and find that the pain becomes less and less intense
-it may go away it may never go away but it becomes smaller and smaller . I have many many regrets -took me ages to realise that the army of satan uses regrets and dwelling on them and self pity(deserved or not) and depression and so on – as his weapons against us to stop us being happy -to make us doubt God -to make us think things like -Why would God have let this happen? to get angry at God .to turn away from God.

As to your question “How do you explain to a guy like me who never went out with her, never kissed her, never went out on a date, still wrestles with this pain, till this day?” I will try to answer that – You are not alone -crush/infatuation does not sound serious enough for what you felt -but I can tell you that they can be, I have had one infatuation that like you I hadn’t had any physical contact and it went on for three to five years and the intense pain I felt was real.In me it was more about rejection and dealing with that. that linked to my low self esteem and it haunted me like you for many years

. I am much older than you I think. how I made it a tiny regret in my mind and no longer a big one was to get busy , and not let satans army any leeway at all by thinking about it less and less – and every time I thought about it I realised by making myself yearn and be depressed I would be going round in circles so I prayed to Jesus not for an answer as you said -but for a coping strategy, and he helped me find ways. when you said you had no answer-I find my answers not as a voice in my head, but in coincidences in life that lead me to find it .-things friends say,a newspaper article you come across, a memory re- surfaces that helps ,a dream where you see the way ahead.

I have so many regrets and bad memories and traumatic events in my past that they tend to line up in my memory not always but generally in order of the most recent being the most painful -and in this i do truly believe that time lessens the pain so much _they say time heals all -but i have found that isn’t always true -but decreasing the pain it does .

philippians 4 ;6,7
Do not be anxious about anything,but in everything ,by prayer and petition ,with thanksgiving present your requests to God and the peace of God which transcends all understanding ,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I used to have a lot of nightmares as a child and then much worse nightmares as an adult .I find that the more i read the bible and pray they disappear from my life but when I stopped I slid into all sorts of unchristian behaviour and the nightmares returned. I now pray every day and read the bible as much as I can , I still have the odd nightmare but I know it is because I have slacked with the praying and reading the bible ,and also it is an attack while asleep and so get back to praying every day with sincerity .

I have said a prayer for you Roger ,I hope some of my words will help you .I’m sorry it is so long -I am bad at summarising .

with christian love warm regards chris

Ps have you tried christian counselling ? or talking about it to a good
friend or a parent or family member? talking it through can be cathartic and lessen the memory also .

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 389 other followers

%d bloggers like this: